Cave Johnson Here!
Apr. 6th, 2013 10:31 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
crossover_chickNow, I know some of you still have personal lives -- why, I don't know -- and some of those personal lives involve kids. Never really understood kids myself. Too small to test! But the bean counters say that reaching out to the 'child market' could help pull us out of the red. So! I bring you: The Official Aperture Science Playset!
Yes, with this playset, your child can learn all about the wonderful work we do here at Aperture Science! It comes with a figure of Test Subject 1408, one of our star employees:
She's articulated at the shoulders, elbows, thighs, knees, waist, and head. Doesn't talk, though. Which is how it should be! No backsassing the researchers. Just going through the tests, getting science done. Inspiration to us all. She also comes with a miniature model of the portal gun. Doesn't actually make miniature portals, though. Just lights up. Kind of useless like that. Somebody get the lab boys on making an actual miniature portal gun!
Anyway, the set also comes with a random personality core and turret. Personality cores come in Fact, Adventure, Space, Intelligence, Anger, Curiosity, Morality, and Intelligence Dampening -- as seen here. Ran into that one in the corridors one day. Nice guy. Go-getter! We could learn a lot from him. Why's he called the Intelligence Dampening Core, anyway? I thought his idea about a swimming pool in the lunch room was pure genius. I have to give you a lunch hour, I can at least make it entertaining.
Oh, right. Turrets come in Standard, Bullseye, Forest Camo, Sunset -- all right, why are we still painting the turrets like this?
*whisper*
Children like 'em? Children have bad taste. But they're already in production, so forget it. Anyway, each playset comes with a completely random core and turret. Collect the whole set! No, seriously, buy as many of these as you can. I have looked at our budget projections, and they are not pretty.
Set also comes with a background of one of the test chambers. Just one background, though. Costs money to print them out. Use your imaginations, kids! Better yet, come in with your parents to work and see the real Aperture Science! Get tested! See how you look in an orange jumpsuit! Parents, convince your kids to run a test or two for us and I promise to make sure your paycheck for the week is good.
Cave Johnson, we're done here.
*huffpuff* And I hope you guys enjoyed that, because my image hosting sites are being COMPLETE AND UTTER ASSHOLES tonight. >.< Refusing to upload certain pictures, uploading empty slots, glitching out when trying to upload multiple images. . . Aaaanoying.
Anyway, that's what I got up at the mall today, thanks to Newbury's sale -- a Portal 2 Playset! Hardly an official one, of course. What we have there is the Chell figure (with the background from the back of her packaging), a keychain flashlight Wheatley (which I still think should come with the optional sound clip: "They told me that I ever used my flashlight, I would DIE!"), and a blindbox toy turret. It does come in a variety of colors and styles -- as you see, I got Forest Camo myself. :) At any rate, I'm very happy with my purchase, even if it did use up the last of my gift card. Ah well, all the Blu-Rays I wanted were way too expensive, soo. . .
Chell, Wheately, and Camo Turret are living up on the Big Figures shelf, of course. Here's the latest configuration:
I've got it sort of set up so Emily's introducing Victoria to her friends, Bonejangles is hanging out with AMA Alice and Cheshire, the Portal 2 peeps are doing their thing, and Victor and A:MR Alice are having their own moment.
Obligatory cute poses picture -- hopefully A:MR Alice will stay in place propped up against the wall like that. Don't fall down, girl!
Other than that, not too much to report. I am currently cheesed off at Subway for being flip-floppy on coupons, so I tried a grilled cheese place in the mall for lunch. Got an Italiano Melt -- provolone cheese with pepperoni and basil. A tiny bit like eating a pizza. :) I also hit Dave & Busters, and was pleased to get another 100% on a song on Guitar Hero and a song I was looking for from the music kiosk. Less pleased to be unable to recharge my card (NONE of the kiosks I tried would take my money), but maybe that's for the best. I won't be going up to the mall for at least another month, and I need cash to buy things at home too. So, yeah. Ended the day with an Oreo shake from Dairy Queen -- om nom nom. With whipped cream, it was like a smaller version of the shakes I like to get when I'm at the movies. Yummy. :)
All right, that's the mall trip out of the way, so here's the other update of the day: Chapter 7 of "Forgetting You!" I hope you all enjoy -- although someone's told me they think the beginning is too abrupt, so tell me if anyone else thinks that's the case too, please.
Oddly quiet night for RP, but I do have a few things to attend to on tumblr, sooo. . . Also should check out![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png)
mallowhallow, I did mean to app during this current cycle. . .
Yes, with this playset, your child can learn all about the wonderful work we do here at Aperture Science! It comes with a figure of Test Subject 1408, one of our star employees:
She's articulated at the shoulders, elbows, thighs, knees, waist, and head. Doesn't talk, though. Which is how it should be! No backsassing the researchers. Just going through the tests, getting science done. Inspiration to us all. She also comes with a miniature model of the portal gun. Doesn't actually make miniature portals, though. Just lights up. Kind of useless like that. Somebody get the lab boys on making an actual miniature portal gun!
Anyway, the set also comes with a random personality core and turret. Personality cores come in Fact, Adventure, Space, Intelligence, Anger, Curiosity, Morality, and Intelligence Dampening -- as seen here. Ran into that one in the corridors one day. Nice guy. Go-getter! We could learn a lot from him. Why's he called the Intelligence Dampening Core, anyway? I thought his idea about a swimming pool in the lunch room was pure genius. I have to give you a lunch hour, I can at least make it entertaining.
Oh, right. Turrets come in Standard, Bullseye, Forest Camo, Sunset -- all right, why are we still painting the turrets like this?
*whisper*
Children like 'em? Children have bad taste. But they're already in production, so forget it. Anyway, each playset comes with a completely random core and turret. Collect the whole set! No, seriously, buy as many of these as you can. I have looked at our budget projections, and they are not pretty.
Set also comes with a background of one of the test chambers. Just one background, though. Costs money to print them out. Use your imaginations, kids! Better yet, come in with your parents to work and see the real Aperture Science! Get tested! See how you look in an orange jumpsuit! Parents, convince your kids to run a test or two for us and I promise to make sure your paycheck for the week is good.
Cave Johnson, we're done here.
*huffpuff* And I hope you guys enjoyed that, because my image hosting sites are being COMPLETE AND UTTER ASSHOLES tonight. >.< Refusing to upload certain pictures, uploading empty slots, glitching out when trying to upload multiple images. . . Aaaanoying.
Anyway, that's what I got up at the mall today, thanks to Newbury's sale -- a Portal 2 Playset! Hardly an official one, of course. What we have there is the Chell figure (with the background from the back of her packaging), a keychain flashlight Wheatley (which I still think should come with the optional sound clip: "They told me that I ever used my flashlight, I would DIE!"), and a blindbox toy turret. It does come in a variety of colors and styles -- as you see, I got Forest Camo myself. :) At any rate, I'm very happy with my purchase, even if it did use up the last of my gift card. Ah well, all the Blu-Rays I wanted were way too expensive, soo. . .
Chell, Wheately, and Camo Turret are living up on the Big Figures shelf, of course. Here's the latest configuration:
I've got it sort of set up so Emily's introducing Victoria to her friends, Bonejangles is hanging out with AMA Alice and Cheshire, the Portal 2 peeps are doing their thing, and Victor and A:MR Alice are having their own moment.
Obligatory cute poses picture -- hopefully A:MR Alice will stay in place propped up against the wall like that. Don't fall down, girl!
Other than that, not too much to report. I am currently cheesed off at Subway for being flip-floppy on coupons, so I tried a grilled cheese place in the mall for lunch. Got an Italiano Melt -- provolone cheese with pepperoni and basil. A tiny bit like eating a pizza. :) I also hit Dave & Busters, and was pleased to get another 100% on a song on Guitar Hero and a song I was looking for from the music kiosk. Less pleased to be unable to recharge my card (NONE of the kiosks I tried would take my money), but maybe that's for the best. I won't be going up to the mall for at least another month, and I need cash to buy things at home too. So, yeah. Ended the day with an Oreo shake from Dairy Queen -- om nom nom. With whipped cream, it was like a smaller version of the shakes I like to get when I'm at the movies. Yummy. :)
All right, that's the mall trip out of the way, so here's the other update of the day: Chapter 7 of "Forgetting You!" I hope you all enjoy -- although someone's told me they think the beginning is too abrupt, so tell me if anyone else thinks that's the case too, please.
Oddly quiet night for RP, but I do have a few things to attend to on tumblr, sooo. . . Also should check out
mallowhallow, I did mean to app during this current cycle. . .
